Yes. Yes. A thousand times and a thousand days yes. I still [in year 5] feel like this sometimes. You are not alone in these feelings, friend! So here’s what I would say to you if we were getting coffee today:
You are [and will continue to be] insufficient to love and serve and teach your students perfectly. There are too many of them with too many different needs, and you are one person. So first off, let yourself off the hook to be all things for all students. You will not be a perfect teacher, you will not reach every student, you will not be a 20-year-veteran after 2 months in the classroom. Give yourself grace to be human, to be imperfect, to not always have a stellar lesson.
But then with that behind you, what do you do when you feel like your standards aren’t to high, when you just want to be adequate and feel like you aren’t even doing that? What do you do when you feel like you are failing them and will win the award for Worst Teacher Ever?
You cry. You share with someone that you feel like a failure. You take a deep breath. You go to sleep at a reasonable time before your guilt-ridden mind can eat you alive.
And the next morning you wake up and try this whole teaching thing again.
Seriously, that’s it. That’s the answer, you keep trying. You keep looking for ideas on how to make the class engaging for the kids who keep falling asleep. You read articles and blog posts that give classroom management tips. You ask your co-worker what to do about that awful student who is disruptive. You write lesson plans, grade, and teach.
You rejoice in the little victories [and write them down]. You go to basketball games and band concerts and invest in relationships with the kids. You love well, and that love will cover a multitude of sins.
And slowly but surely, you’ll get better. Although you feel like a failure as a teacher right now, you sent this message to me. I promise, promise, promise that means you’re a far better teacher than you realize. The only truly bad teacher is one who doesn’t care to grow. You’re scared of failing your kids. That’s proof that you aren’t. So chin up. You’ve got this.
After a tough end to last week, I needed this to get myself together and get ready for the week ahead. Just need to keep trying. Snix, you have such a way with words.
Disclaimer: The contents of this website are mine personally and do not reflect any position of the US government or Peace Corps